This is by far the most common social weapon. Although some types of gossip may help a persons reputation, the overwhelming majority of the "shock talk" people indulge in is harmful and mean spirited. To add to the sinister nature of this tactic, it is most often done behind the target's back.
Rumours and gossip are often used as revenge or follow through on a threat. Something for one person to say in order to make themselves look important or to get attention. So how do you handle it if you are targeted by a gossip hound? Here are some tips:
Remember that no matter what you say or do SOME people are going to believe the rumours. Your goal is to mitigate damages since it is next to impossible to make everyone believe your side of the story.
Don't confront the person who spread the gossip about you in a public place or with an angry tone in your voice. Causing a scene or going on the offensive will only make them feel they are justified in spreading venom. It is best to avoid this person all together and to say nothing to them. But if you do have to say something, wait until you are calm and the initial shock has passed.
Rather than freaking out and running around trying to set the record straight, play it cool! When it gets back to you laugh lightly and say something like, "Is THAT what's going around about me? I wonder why somebody would go to so much trouble to spread a lie?" This does two things; it shows others that you have nothing to hide because you are not acting defensively, and it puts the burden of reliability back on the gossip spreader by making others wonder if there is a hidden agenda.
Spread the gossip yourself, "Have you heard what so-and-so is saying about me? What a joke!" and do it with a smile. Always sound calm and confused, never bitter and resentful.
If anyone asks if the rumour is true say, "No of course not, but does it really matter what I say? I just wish I knew why so-and-so started this one in the first place." If it is true, omit the "No" and just say, "Does it really matter what I say? I just wish I knew why so-and-so spread this around in the first place!".
Calm is key! Always be calm, even baffled, when the rumour is mentioned. If you freak out in protest it looks like you have something to hide. Even if you do have something to hide, playing it cool is always best. Don't retaliate with your own gossip. You are better than that!
Q.
1. Do you like to gossip ?
2. Why do you think people like to do and listen to gossip?
3. Have you ever experienced gossip about you by others ? How did you handle it ?
4. What are the most common themes for gossip?
5. What are some ways which gossip can be harmful?
6. Do you think gossip can be used for something good? For example ?
7. Why do people like to gossip about the rich and famous?
8. What is the strangest or most unbelievable gossip you have ever heard? Do you think those are true?
9. What do you think about the tips in the article ? Do you think it works ?
